3 things.

A PR member posted an interesting prompt last week as a positive challenge...What 3 things can you praise about yourself? And then, after an honest assessment, what 3 things would you change?

This exercise started out nobly enough, with lovely women contemplating the things they loved about themselves (how refreshing!) but after a couple of pages, it was depressing. Because the 3 things "I would change" were almost always physical, and even more depressing they were physical changes they just knew they could change if they tried hard enough. The 3 things they loved were rushed through, simplified even, but the 3 things to change were lengthy!

I participated. Not because I enjoy beating myself up in public. But because I wanted to make a point...Your physical appearance is ultimately not the thing people will remember you for. Your character, your love, the way you light up a room with your energy and presence. That has nothing to do with your weight or your thighs or your stomach or your laugh lines.

You, every single one of you reading this, are important! You're beautiful, you're strong, you're independent. You're funny and capable. You're mothers, sisters, aunts.

You're my friends.

And every single one of you is worth so much more than the 3 things you would change. Those 3 things mean NOTHING to me, and I suspect they mean nothing to the people who surround you, who love you just because you're you.


In case you're wondering, here was my response to the post challenge:

I won't be changing anything physical about myself. I like me. Flaws and all. Keepers: 1. My eyes & smile, my "beauty mark", my pointy chin...actually I rather like my whole face. We've been together a long time. 2. My curvy, girly shape 3. My longish legs (especially for 5'4-1/2!!) Changes: 1. Hairstyle...it's time for a new one! 2. My "lounging" wardrobe...I love to be comfy at home, but I'd like to be cute too! 3. Manicure & Pedicure...I need to give myself one more often! I love having pretty, sparkling toes.

I can happily say, it was difficult for me to come up with 3 things to change. And what a really wonderful feeling that was.

We can lament the media portrayal of women, and the unrealistic body expectations we're bombarded with, and the celebrities who sell out and cash in...but really, are we any better if we're just trashing ourselves all the time? Wasting precious creativity and resources trying to change?

What if...and this is a crazy thought...what if we all just LET IT GO. What if we all loved ourselves, exactly as we are, for exactly WHAT we are right now. This moment. And every moment, from here forward.

The world would change. That's what.

Casting Crowns...Does Anybody Hear Her?

Road Less Traveled

I've noticed a trend in blogworld of late. I like to call it the "Look at me Look at me" blog.

Now, blogging in general is a "look at me" kind of activity. But there are blogs out there where the blogger is Queen of the Barn and the sheep flock around her. It doesn't matter what craft, project, or personal crisis Barn Queen blogs about, the sheep can't get enough. Even if its obviously ugly. Or poorly made. Or just boring.

It's like a quasi-high school popularity contest, which, by the way...I thought we all outgrew a couple of decades ago. The more things change the more they stay the same...

And you know what? When I'm directed to those blogs by friends or fellow bloggers, I come away feeling deflated. Because that's not how I blog, or how I write. Or how I AM. And I don't want to change.

I like to think my blog is me. My personality comes through in the way I write, and the things I write about (no matter how off the wall...or cuff...they may be.)

Which IS the point.

So I refuse to apologize, dear lurkers, for being whole-ly un-Queenlike and completely irreverent and often off-topic. I DO eventually get back around to the topic at hand (sewing.)

And, besides, isn't the journey half the fun?

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Totally Free. Like, totally.

You know what bugs me about digital art these days? Everyone's hung up on copyright. Yes, I completely understand about artist integrity and every person getting their due respect and accolades. Blah blah blahedy blah. But when you go to PURCHASE graphics for ebay template building (or web building or scrapbook making, etc etc) there's always a mile long Terms Of Use statement to plow through. And nine times out of ten, they all state...Not for Commercial use. Nu-uh. No way. No how. Period. Finito.

I even read one last week that went into explicit detail about all the ways you could NOT use her graphics, listing specifically you could not use them for websites, blogs, ebay auctions, templates OR for any other reason known to mankind where someone might actually SEE the graphic.

People. We're not ALL pirates! Furthermore, the good and decent people who want to buy your graphics to use on a webpage are actually PAYING you to do so! Now most times, there is also a commercial license. That is WAY more expensive than makes it worthwhile to purchase for a simple ebay auction template.


Sooo... Rather than comb through a billion TOU agreements, I got fed up and created my own. These 7 little "blings" were created in PSP X by me, using totally free tubes, photos, or scans. The jewels are in .png format to plop down on whatever you so choose. Auction template? Sure! Website?? You bet! Grab them below!

Red Flower Sequin
Hot Pink Flower Sequin
Yellow Flower Sequin
Orange Flower Sequin
Pink Pearl
White Pearl
Black Pearl

Oh, and one more...a Clear Crystal that I forgot to stick in the preview photo!

You: Wha... You mean they're free?

Always.

Half a Woman. Or Less.

I sew. Right? I'm inspired by designers...by all kinds of things. I tend to fall in love with a particular pattern maker or designer & religiously buy all their patterns...even if I end up never sewing ONE. It's a sickness, I'll admit it.

But I'm drawing the line at Khaliah Ali...who turned my pattern world upside down a couple of years ago when she debuted a Plus line through Simplicity. Cute, trendy styles in larger sizes. No One was DOING THIS. She, simply put, rocked. She personally modeled the patterns...and looked great. Proof below.


Then, shortly after, she chose to have gastric bypass surgery to lose weight. Frankly, I don't see her weight as being of the "gastric bypass surgery" level in those pictures. (But perhaps she had already started losing weight when these were taken? I really can't say. )

What I CAN say is that in her next collection she still looked fabulous, but obviously thinner...and her patterns were now available in smaller sizes (not just Plus). I was saddened by the GB Surgery information. It seems like such an extreme measure to take to lose weight.


And....sadly...this is a current collection photo from her Simplicity line...


She no longer looks good.

Her color is off, she's wan and somewhat "peaked" as my grandma would say. She just doesn't look well. I've seen this look in many a GB patient, frankly. It's usually due to MALNUTRITION.

People. STOP. Just stop. There is no reason to risk your life to fit into smaller jeans. There's no reason to give up your health, your sanity, a million thoughts a day because you feel that you're too "fat". Just eat. Ok? Love who you are, what you are, and if you don't....work on fixing THAT. And I'm not talking about body size. What if you were blind? Or paralyzed? Or on dialysis because of failing kidneys? Or sick with Stage 4 ovarian cancer? Would you be having gastric bypass then so you can be thin? Nope. Thin would probably be the furthest thing from your mind.

As a society we spend way too much time worried about the size of our a$$es. Mine is currently "too big" according to society's standards. I will never win an Oscar in a bone skimming (oops, I mean body-skimming) silk slip dress.

I won't say I'll never win an Oscar though.

You see, I believe in my self worth. I believe that I am something to be reckoned with. And that has nothing to do with the size of my a$$. It has everything to do with the person I am inside. Talent, ambition, grace, style. These things have nothing to do with a number on a scale that doesn't exist outside of gravity.

Love yourself. Whatever and whoever you are. Because you are really that special...and you can DO ANYTHING. Believe that...and you'll see how unimportant that number sewn into a scrap of denim really is.

a.